Mathematics and Faulty Ethics Advice

This is an exaggeration, but sometimes I feel like I could start a whole blog responding to Randy Cohen’s incorrect answers in his weekly “Ethicist” New York Times Sunday Magazine column. (The truth is I’d probably only get one good post every other week, but that’s still an astonishingly high rate of bad “advice” – if that’s even what it is attempting to be. On the opposite end of the hypothetical niche blog topic spectrum, I would have to quit my full time job to track Mike Lupica’s bad predictions and silly statements; and that’s really just counting the 30 minutes of Sports Reporters, never mind his columns in the Daily News.)

Back to Cohen… I’ve got several 80% complete yet-not-quite-fully-polished posts about his column in my “unfinished” folder regarding past logical transgressions, but this morning I felt compelled to ask Mrs. ACDL to watch the kids by herself - I’ll have to pay that back - while I came over to tap out a few thoughts about today’s column.

If you’ve already read the column, Truth in Suspension, you may be guessing that I objected to the first scenario, where a reader asks Cohen if it had been ethical for a private school to label the discipline meted out to some kids caught using marijuana a “restriction” instead of a “suspension”, presumably, the reader posits, so as not to ruin their college admission status.

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Misdemeanor Jail Call

From Law is Cool:

"You mean,” he said, this look of absolute unbelief working across his face, “you mean, if I’m guilty I get out today?”

“Right.”

“And if I’m innocent I stay locked up?”

“You got it, man.  So what are you gonna be, guilty or innocent?”

James Mills, One Just Man, Simon and Schuster

Theft in Texas: One Pet = Nine Cows = Ninety Nine Goats

The Texas Penal Code has a “value ladder” for theft. Get yourself accused of stealing:

  • Less than $50   = Class C Misdemeanor – max $500 fine
  • $50 < $500         = Class B Misdemeanor – max 6 months in jail
  • $500 < $1500    = Class A Misdemeanor – max 1 year in jail (but see)

Et cetera, et cetera. Theft of $1500 up to $20,000 is a State Jail Felony and it just keeps on going up and up from there. This makes some sense. After all, stealing a nickel from me somehow seems less egregious than ripping me off for a whole lot of money.

But the Texas Legislature meets every two years, and there’s nothing better for your re-election campaign eighteen months after the session ends than going back home and telling your constituents that you got “Tough on Crime”. So let’s tweak those criminal laws, shall we?

What if someone steals a [Gasp! Fill-in-the-Blank… but it’s not really valued as much as it should be!] and only gets punished as if they stole something with an equivalent monetary value? Why they’d be getting away with something, and goodness knows you Don’t Mess With Texas.

So throughout the years, several extra important things have been super-criminalized in Texas. The prosecutor won’t need to prove the value of the property stolen: if you stole it, extra punishment will come.

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By the Time Sanjay Gupta Was My Age...

...he was being considered for Surgeon General. (With my hearty apologies to the better line: “By the time Mozart was my age… he was dead.”)

 

Right wing nut jobs (see the above link) are going ballistic over the travesty of appointing a neurosurgeon with a healthy background in communicating with the public to a position whose duties require him to be “America's chief health educator by providing Americans the best scientific information available on how to improve their health and reduce the risk of illness and injury”.

Funny that they didn’t object when the Republican Propaganda Network’s Fox News Network’s Tony Snow was named White House Press Secretary. But enough making fun of the wackos; it’s like shooting fish in the proverbial barrel. 

 

My compatriots at NORML and other marijuana decriminalization supporters may be discouraged to know that Gupta is already on record saying the usual idiotic things about the current state of our marijuana laws

 

Actually, it’s worse than the typical stuff. He freely admits that the science shows marijuana can be good medicine for Alzeheimer’s, cancer, glaucoma and MS patients to name a few… but still wants to allow states to throw people in jail for simple possession. In fact, he’s seemingly all for it.

 

<Sigh> 

 

Well, maybe that’s appropriate for the Surgeon General. After all, it’s a job you can get fired from immediately… if you dare to tell the truth.

 

[Update: I forgot to include one of my first posts ever... the DEA vs. the American Medical Association on the benefits of medical marijuana.]

Police Worry That Marijuana Decriminalization May Reduce Number of Arrests

No kidding.

Last November Massachusetts’s voters approved a ballot initiative which reduced the penalty for possession of less than one ounce of marijuana from a possible maximum of six months in jail and a permanent blotch on your criminal history to a maximum of a $100 civil penalty, no jail and with nothing at all ever being reported to the state’s criminal history board.  Anyone under 18 would also be required to take a drug education program and to complete some community service.

The voters spoke loud and clear. The legislature had until a few days ago to amend or repeal the initiative, but they chose not to. These are the same folks that scream bloody murder when an actual bill to decriminalize is placed on their desks. Truly the definition of political courage there, eh? The world will come to an end if you vote to reduce marijuana punishment, but if the voters insist on it… you’ll look the other way.

At any rate, the measure becomes law, and now the police are apparently befuddled. What should they do? You know, now that this new wrinkle complicates things for them so:

 

Police say they have two main problems with the law.

 

Many complain that their current citation books lack a check-off box for marijuana possession and they have yet to receive updated ticket books, although temporary forms are available through a state website.

 

Seriously? No check-off box for marijuana on your standard preprinted forms? Writing in “possession of marijuana < 1 oz.” somewhere on the ticket is harder than arresting, transporting, booking, interviewing and one presumes eventually releasing a defendant from jail?

 

Ok, so what’s the other problem?

 

More fundamentally, they complain that officers have no way of determining the identity of people they stop on the street for smoking marijuana.

 

Before the law was changed, officers could arrest them, or threaten them with arrest to force them to show identification. Now, they say they cannot force users to show IDs, and cannot arrest them if they refuse to identify themselves.  [N.B. Texans should read Austin Criminal Law Journal’s explanation of why that ain’t so in the Lone Star State.]

 

Oh, so it sounds like any other civil penalty then, right? Like a parking ticket maybe? And maybe someone will – hang on to your hats for this one – not pay their $100 fine.  They might get off scot-free.

 

The mere thought of it sends police organizations scrambling:

 

John M. Collins, general counsel for the Massachusetts Chiefs of Police Association, said he had been fielding calls from dozens of members across the state.

 

This is to be expected since major changes in the administration of justice often cause numerous disruptions in the law enforcement community. Being told to write tickets for simple possession instead of hauling folks off to jail requires lots of planning and reorganizing priorities, etc.

 

How are some police agencies dealing with the situation?

 

[M]any police departments across the state were essentially ignoring the voter-passed law, saying they would not even bother to ticket people they see smoking marijuana…

 

Andrew J. Sluckis Jr., chief of police in Auburn, said his 39 officers would not be issuing $100 citations for possession of an ounce or less of marijuana, as required under the ballot initiative known as Question 2.

 

"If the Legislature enacts some changes, we'll be happy to do it in the future, but as it stands now we're not going to be issuing civil citations," he said. If an officer spots someone smoking marijuana, he said, "We will confiscate it and the person will be sent on their way."

 

"It is frustrating," he added, "because we have to deal with a law that is almost non-enforceable at best."

 

Don’t give up all hope Chief Sluckis. Turns out that non-enforcement is the goal in and of itself. That ole “voter-passed” law that has you all in a dither? It doesn’t require you to give everyone a ticket…

 

It simply requires you to stop arresting them. So while you might think you are teaching those voters a lesson by throwing up your hands and insisting their wishes are impossible to carry out and therefore you will do nothing at all… you are actually following their instructions to a T.

Directing Your Free Speech Towards the Police

From the recitation of facts in the Supreme Court of South Dakota’s recent decision reversing a defendant’s disorderly conduct conviction on the grounds of free speech:

[A]t approximately 2:00 a.m. in Brookings, South Dakota, the bars on Brookings’ Main Avenue had just closed, and the bar patrons were gathering on the sidewalks outside the bars. [The defendant] Suhn was among an estimated 100 people gathered on the sidewalk.

 

At this same time, two Brookings’ police officers patrolled Main Avenue in their vehicle. Officer David Gibson sat on the passenger seat of the vehicle. He had his window fully open as the vehicle approached the area where the sidewalk crowd was gathered.

 

As the patrol car passed the sidewalk crowd, Gibson heard Suhn yell obscenities in the direction of the police car. Specifically, Suhn yelled: “Fucking cop, piece of shit. You fucking cops suck. Cops are a bunch of fucking assholes.”

 

Officer Gibson leaned out of the window of the police car and made eye contact with Suhn. He identified Suhn as the speaker. Gibson also observed that the others on the sidewalk had expressions of “what are you doing?” in response to Suhn’s comments.

 

Officer Gibson immediately left the patrol car and walked toward Suhn, who was then standing with his back to the patrol car. The officer grabbed Suhn by the arm and arrested him for his earlier utterance. Suhn was charged and convicted of disorderly conduct. Suhn appeals, raising one issue:

 

Whether the circuit court’s application of the disorderly conduct statute to Suhn’s utterances amounted to an abridgement of speech in violation of the First Amendment.

 

 

The decision hits some of the highlights of 20th Century First Amendment Supreme Court jurisprudence, citing Chaplinsky v. New Hampshire, Cohen v. California (AKA “Fuck the Draft”), Gooding v. Wilson and Lewis v. City of New Orleans among others. I don’t get to dip my foot in First Amendment waters all that often, so it’s always fun to have a refresher course.

 

The court reverses the conviction finding that:

 

As offensive or abusive as Suhn’s invective to the police may have been, “when addressed to the ordinary citizen,” Suhn’s words were not “inherently likely to provoke violent reaction.” See Cohen, 403 US at 20, 91 SCt at 1785, 29 LEd2d 284 (citing Chaplinsky, 315 US 568, 62 SCt 766, 86 LEd 1031). The circuit court erred in determining that Suhn’s utterances were unprotected speech.

 

While I applaud the result, I don’t know that I agree that the defendant’s words were indeed not “likely to provoke a violent reaction”. In fact, let’s take a look at the dissent’s version of the “fighting words” exception to the free speech doctrine:

 

Under this definition, the words spoken need not actually incite an immediate breach of the peace. Rather, they need only tend to incite an immediate breach.

 

Furthermore, “[t]he test is what men of common intelligence would understand would be words likely to cause an average addressee to fight.” Chaplinsky at 573, 62 SCt at 770, 86 LEd 1031.

 

An average addressee… that is, in this case, a police officer? The dissent wants the conviction to stand, because even though it didn’t actually happen in this case, the defendant’s words are the type that would provoke an average cop to beat the hell out of someone? Is that what they’re saying?

 

The irony here is that I agree with the result of the majority, but agree with some (all?) of the reasoning of the dissenters. Criminal defense lawyers are quite used to clients coming in with bruises and scrapes of all kinds in cases where they didn’t exactly show the proper amount of respect to the badge. Sometimes police do overreact to this kind of situation, and our clients – while they bring it on themselves – do suffer for it. Right there in the middle of the street.

 

So if fighting words aren’t free speech, and the legal test to determine whether the speaker is using fighting words is whether or not the listener is likely to react violently to them, doesn’t your free speech depend on whether or not your audience has anger management problems? That seems like an odd way to measure it.

 

More disturbing though is the dissent’s acknowledgment that police in general would react violently to this type of speech. Don’t they teach police that they are likely to hear this kind of nonsense, especially right after closing time? And no matter how vile the words spoken may be, isn’t actually expecting a violent reaction from the police a sad comment in and of itself?