From “Neither Had Sense”:

And then there’s always the resort to arrest and charges to cover up and justify their use of force.

Use of the Taser and the pepper spray appear to be justified according to the department’s policy, he [Christopher Levy, a Police Department spokesman] said.

This line, which almost invariably appears in every media account following the inappropriate use of force, often goes unnoticed, but is possibly the most troubling of all. Why should the police department’s "policy" trump the law, the Constitution, the rights of citizens to exist without being harmed by police resort to force whenever it suits them?

The answer, it appears, is that it’s a necessary component of the public relations efforts of law enforcement to instill a belief in the public that they are entitled to do so. It’s their policy.

And if it’s their policy, it must be proper. After all, if it was improper, it couldn’t be their policy, could it?

In addition to a general “Taser First, Ask Questions Later” policy, I’ve got some other suggestions. My police chief readers are hereby authorized to plagiarize, if they want to:

We, the [Fill-In-The-Blank] Police Department, do enact the following policies:

  • “Hunch” Detentions
  • Searches Without Probable Cause or Consent
  • Unmirandized Custodial Interrogations
  • Warrantless Blood Draws For All DWIs, Preferably On The Street
  • Suspects Brought Before Magistrates “When We Feel Like It”
  • Cutting And Pasting New Arrestees Name Into Old Offense Report (Saves Time)
  • Perjury OK, If You’re Pretty Damn Sure He Did It (Otherwise No)
  • Irrebutable Presumption Of Good Faith

A final sad thought. If it’s not obvious, I started typing this list out as a joke. Then it occurred to me, wait, I could give case citations for most of these “jokes”.