From an email several months back:

Writing on behalf of my son. We are completely frustrated with our attorney choice.

They told us 99% it would be dismissed in our first meeting. Court date arrives and then a new attorney starts on the case. There was no hope it would be dismissed.

The email continues to talk about the parent’s frustration about surcharges, and driver’s license suspension issues that they were never advised about. Which means, of course, that by the time the email comes to me, the son has already plead guilty.

I called and talked to them, and wasn’t a lot of help, except I asked a few questions and was able to at least explain the law, and the situation they were in post plea and conviction. There are quite a few collateral consequences for DWI convictions in Texas, and a halfway decent lawyer will at least explain those to someone so they, the client, can make an informed decision about whether to try or plead the case.

But 99%? You fell for that one? A lawyer tells you there’s a ninety-nine percent chance of getting a DWI dismissed without doing any work on the case? Hasn’t read the police report, hasn’t seen the video…

But I guess if you believe that, you’ll accept the lawyer’s later explanation: hey, I didn’t say 100%. The 99%, that’s all my other clients.