In bold, the search terms that Google Analytics tracked to my site:

Sect of liars – I belong to several different criminal defense lawyer associations, so it seems appropriate for me to rank highly for this term.

Bong hits for Satan – Turns out my wife was right.

Released from prison now what – like most questions, the answer is “it depends”. Tempted to say celebrate, but wait… are you on parole?

The baby who was gonna be split in half – Actually no. The baby was never in any danger.

Is marijuana an alien substance – God made pot; man made beer.

Prosecutorial “ethics” – Love, love, looooooove the quotation marks.

My ex does not pay his taxes – as long as he’s simply not filing, it’s only a misdemeanor. Surely you can come up with something better than that.

Al Gore should go to prison – Sure, global warming, global shwarming; biggest scam ever. But prison?

Bologna gravy – I hope you were looking for lyrics, and not a recipe.

Anyone who steals should be sent to prison no matter how small the thing is that they steal – Remind me to strike you from my next jury panel.

Are the police in the UK allowed to lie to you Probably. But you should ask D.A.Confidential. Or Charon Q.C.

Is a criminal attorney and a defense attorney the same thing – to most people, yes.

And finally… Crappy lawyer – As predicted by Paul Walcutt, I now dominate Google for this search term.